Spring has Sprung

.... and apparently I as a human, am not immune to the animalistic desires that arise in spring time..... Cue "Let's get it on" - two boys in my bed in less than 24 hours - dear me, I believe the hoe is back. (My friend Eesh used to say "You my friend, but you my hoe friend" - being a hoe can be fun, but I don't think that's quite the direction I want to go right now... ;) maybe)

In other news, I keep forgetting that I gave up liquor for Lent and God keeps thumping me for my forgetfulness. (I also gave up hamburgers, which I seem to fare better at remembering not to partake of...) Anyway, this last instance in which I forgot that I was abstaining from alcohol was quite the interesting night, definitely worth recounting.

I went kind of like this plus or minus a few things:

I got home from rehearsal and was wiped out, I was supposed to go out with this guy I had met online and talked to a few times. He seemed nice enough but was a talker... but in the annoying way. So, he convinces me to come out against my better judgment.

I traipse all the way out to north Tally to meet him. In the mean time I pass several open burger joints and remember my promise to God while looking for the crackers I know are somewhere in my car (Dinner was almost seven hours ago and it was very small.... You can guess where this is going). I get to the bar, he's drinking a Martini so I decide to have one also. Then we get another round, and another until I am what you might call "shit faced." - he intelligently doesn't fish his third, so I try to.... bad choice number two of the night, or three if you count coming out as a bad choice ( I would like to implant in your vernacular B.L.D. - signifying Bad Life Decision, you know you love it). I try to take him home... not knowing exactly where he lives... and then we end up at my house. Things at this point get fuzzy. What I do know is that I think that I turn on the water heater but instead turn off the Furnace, so we froze all night long and I took a frigid shower the next day. I fell into my bath tub, yanking down the shower curtain, not once dear friends, but twice and managed to vomit on the shower curtain.... hot. This is where the night got messy. He tried to "help" me by forcing me to the toilet to vomit. I do not like to be "helped" or man handled when drunk, so that didn't go over well. I made my way to the kitchen, fending him off as I went, to put the shower curtain in a trash bag. Threw-up out of my back door - in my underwear.... aaaaand generally made a fool of myself in front of this man.

The next day, I was hung over all. day. long. I threw up at home, at work and almost did so everywhere else. I chauffeured Mr. Talks-a-lot home and he has been calling me ever since.... weird. (I would ignore my existence like the plague if I were him...) it was a miraculous event that I made it through a whole 3 hour rehearsal without vomiting again. - God, I got the message, no Liquor til the end of Lent.

Spring break has come, thank Jesus. I rewarded myself with a pair of cow boy boots at Good Finds Tallahassee (for 15 bucks!) and Antiquing all day Saturday like the true doily draped dame I am inside. I am an old cat-totin' granny, let's be real. An odd little paradox, however, is that I have worn those boots non-stop since I got them, and they make me feel like I finally got one of the things I have wanted my WHOLE LIFE. I am like a little kid when I put them on and simultaneously like the hairy chested, cigarette smokin', gun slingin' cowboys that I always thought were the pinnacle of masculinity. Hot. So in short I'm a Kid-Granny, Hairy chested-Doiliy collecting, Gun totin/Cat cuddling Gay man. - - - and what's more important is not what I am, but that I like it.

Other retail therapy took place Sunday when Mom took me to Belk and got me two very cute Lacoste Polos for 50% off... they are perfect for spring!! and, though I am not a Label Licker - I have never owned a Lacoste shirt... so I felt kind of cool and special walking out of the store with them in my bag (wearing my cowboy boots.)

I don' feel like a train wreck anymore and I feel okay with who I am an where I am going. School is still kind of on the back burner, but I am working on getting that together. I feel the gym coming in my near future.... I went to the beach on Sunday afternoon and saw the usual gentlemen that make you want to kill them for their statuesque perfection and take them home with you to have your way with them.... I say this periodically, but I really just want to feel good about the way I look, so, time to do something about it.

Apparently this is a period of personal growth that I have stumbled upon. Surprise!

I am not going to Atlanta this week so that I can properly say goodbye to Aid, a beautiful person and a MAJOR player in the restructuring of my post-Gem life and, possibly, welcome Lex if she comes - - - this means I cannot see Peach, her new serious beau ( kudos, darlin' ) or any of my other ATL friends, but I will be sure to make a trip after the opera!


Suffice it all to say that my life is a little messy, my methods a bit unusual, and my head and heart are in transition but I am happy and loving myself and being alive. I am working on myself daily and not every day is a good one, but over all, I can still laugh and love who I am at the end of the day.

Wishing you all the very best, missing each of you and sending you love, prayers and mischief. ;)

-AA